have you ever realised that sleeping is just your eyes staring at your eyelids all night long
im such a sarcastic bitch it’s beautiful
Eventually we’re just gonna have to accept “ducking” as a swear word
everything good makes you fat an addict or broke
Isn’t it weird how glue doesn’t get stuck to the container it’s in
if i’m not eating i’m most likely not happy
i love when dogs sigh. its like, hey bud, long day at the office?
Do you want to create an emotionally stable life together and adopt a dog or nah.
when u accidentally say something REALLY RUDE in front of people u just met
”if you’re ill why are you on the computer”
IT MAKES ME REALLY HAPPY WHEN PEOPLE REFER TO ME AS THEIR FRIEND WHOA. FRIEND
when you say something funny and your friends laugh
what happens if u put a werewolf on the moon is a great question probably the best question ever asked
when a hot person calls themselves ugly